Self Injury

Self injury, ask agony aunt online, free online agony auntys, aunties, aunty. This is a very upsetting subject because you could be the parent of or related to someone who behaves this way and feel totally unsure about why they do it or how to stop them. You may also feel guilty because you feel that you must have done or said something that pushed them towards it. The facts speak for themselves. It is usually young people who do this. Men and boys tend to go for very physical methods such as shooting themselves (or trying to), hanging themselves, jumping off a roof, glass etc and women and girls tend to go for gentler methods such as taking medication. Those who only want to harm themselves in an effort to just feel better for a short while, the ones who are addicted to it, usually tend to cut themselves or burn themselves but some also drink a lot of alcohol, take a lot of overdoses and go down the route of much less obvious methods to the untrained or naive eye, such as not eating much and losing a lot of weight, or not washing or taking care of their physical health and appearance and ending up with bad teeth or nits in their hair.

With some self injury is a case of being a masochist whilst with others it is a case of trying to escape from the awful emptiness, loneliness or pain they feel and using whatever seems to work at the time.The trouble is that if you tell a self harmer that they need help they will usually insist they do not have a problem and prefer to continue with their behaviour than change it.  These can become addicted to it just as an alcoholic drinks a lot or a smoker smokes a lot. To them it is not a problem it is a solution to a problem. If they are sensitive and feeling desperately miserable they may get a few seconds of relief when they cut themselves, they may even get a sense of feeling wonderful, hence the next time they get the chance to and feel awful they do it again. They need to see a qualified therapist who can understand the underlying reasons as to why they behave the way they do, and react to it the way they do. Their family and friends may be able to support them but they cannot solve the problem.